Midlife Body Changes and the Simple Habits That Help

If your body has been feeling unfamiliar and nothing seems to work the way it used to, Shari offers a health coach's perspective on what may be happening and simple habits that can help. Your body has been trying to get your attention. This episode helps you start listening.

Click here to listen.

Key Takeaways

• Your body is not broken and not the problem. It's the messenger.
• Fatigue, brain fog, cravings, and unpredictable moods aren't random or weakness. They're information.
• Estrogen and progesterone fluctuate and decline in midlife, affecting sleep, mood, energy, metabolism, and brain function, not just your cycle.
• Chronic stress and hormonal shifts amplify each other through a cycle: elevated cortisol affects blood sugar, blood sugar affects sleep and mood, disrupted sleep affects hormones.
• Midlife doesn't respond well to force. It responds to rhythm, in nourishment, movement, rest, and how you listen to yourself.
• Small, consistent changes (like a consistent breakfast) can shift energy and mood more than a complete overhaul.

Resources

• 🎯 Take the free Midlife Spark Type Quiz: https://www.sharibiery.com/quiz
• 📗 Read It's Your Turn: https://www.sharibiery.com/its-your-turn-book
• 🌐 Website: https://www.sharibiery.com
• 📖 Join Me on Substack: https://sharibiery.substack.com/p/start-here

Transcript

Doing Everything Right and Still Feeling Off

[00:00:02] Shari Biery: You're listening to It's Your Turn with Shari Biery. I'm Shari, a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach, bestselling author, speaker, and creator of the C.A.L.M. Method. Each week, this show is about taking your turn in midlife, embracing new purpose, new passions, and new possibilities. New episodes drop weekly, so be sure to subscribe wherever you listen to your podcasts. Now, let's get started.

There was a point in my life when I was doing everything I had always done with my body. Eating the same way, moving my body, getting what I thought was enough sleep. And none of it was working the way it used to.

My energy was different, my sleep was lighter. I would wake up tired, even after a full night's sleep. Things that used to feel manageable started to feel really heavy.

And my first instinct was to try harder. So, of course, we all jump into this. We try to eat better, we exercise more, we try to be more disciplined, and for me, that didn't work either.

And what I eventually learned, and I want to share with you today, is that my body was not failing me, it was trying to tell me something. It was telling me that this season of life required something different. Not more effort or force. It was a different kind of listening.

Your Body Is Not the Problem

[00:01:41] Shari Biery: So, one of the most important things I hope you hear today is, your body is not the problem. Your body's not broken, it's not betraying you. Your body is really the messenger.

The fatigue, the brain fog, the cravings. The sleep that doesn't quite restore you. The moods that feel unpredictable, the way stress hits differently now. These are not random symptoms, and they're not signs of weakness. They are not things you need to push through or fix with willpower. They are information.

Your body is telling you that the strategies that worked in your thirties or even your forties are not designed for the season you are in now. Midlife is a different season. And different seasons require different rhythms.

What's Actually Happening in Your Body

[00:02:49] Shari Biery: So what's actually happening in our body? I'm going to go through a little bit of education here, and I just want to remind you that anything you have concerns about, either medical or mental health, you should always discuss that with your primary care provider. None of this is medical advice, I'm just sharing some connections that I want you to open your mind to understanding, if you haven't already, or maybe something you're going to hear today is going to reaffirm what you've been feeling.

So in midlife, there is a significant shift that begins to happen hormonally. I know I don't have to tell you this if you are a woman in midlife, and you're probably one who has laughed, or snickered, when menopause is mentioned. Which, this isn't anything really to laugh about anymore when you're in the throes of symptoms. So, let's begin to understand it and educate ourselves on it so that we can get better supported.

So, the thing to know is estrogen and progesterone begin to fluctuate and eventually decline. And these hormones don't just affect your menstrual cycle, they affect everything. They affect your sleep, your mood, your energy, your stress response, your metabolism, your brain function, your heart function. How your body stores and uses fuel.

And at the same time, many women in midlife are also navigating one of the highest demand periods of their lives. Think about this. We have careers that may be ramping up even more so. You might have aging parents you're helping care for, or adult children that are still needing some support, or different needs. Or you have grandchildren, you have relationships, you have the invisible load of running a household and a life.

Chronic stress and hormonal shifts interact with each other. They amplify each other. So when you feel like things that used to work are no longer working, you're not imagining it. You're not doing it wrong. The equation has changed.

The Stress, Sugar, and Hormones Cycle

[00:05:30] Shari Biery: In Chapter 6 of my book, It's Your Turn, I write about what I call the connection of stress, sugar, and hormones. These three things are really deeply interrelated, especially in midlife, and when you understand how they interact, everything starts to make more sense.

Chronic low-level stress, that kind most women in midlife are carrying constantly, it keeps our cortisol elevated. And elevated cortisol affects how your body handles blood sugar. So when your blood sugar is imbalanced, it affects your energy, your mood, your cravings, and your sleep. And disrupted sleep really affects your hormones. And your hormones affect your stress response. So, it's a cycle.

And the way out of that cycle is not more discipline or pushing harder, it's understanding what is driving it and responding differently.

Rhythms Over Rigid Routines

[00:06:43] Shari Biery: So, something I say quite often in the Reclaim You program and coaching that I do is midlife does not respond well to force. It responds to rhythm.

What I mean by this is things like, I talk about the all-or-nothing approach. Have you ever had that? Where you're like, I've got to do a workout three days a week, I can't stop, I've got to have it perfectly before I can even get started, or I'll start when. It's like we have this all-or-nothing approach to it. Things like that, or the rigid plan, when you have something so rigid it's hard to follow, or the punishing workout, the restrictive way of eating. These strategies create more stress in a body that's already navigating hormonal change and elevated cortisol.

So what works instead is building these consistent, supportive rhythms. Let me offer some ideas here, and just think about this for a moment, and see which one may be your first one to focus on.

First one is rhythms around how you nourish yourself. And I'm not talking about a diet, not a meal plan, I'm talking about a consistent way of fueling your body that keeps your blood sugar steady and gives you the energy you need. When I talk with women and ask them, tell me a day in your life, many times, they don't even talk about food or planning a meal. It's usually either, oh, I forgot to eat lunch, or I don't eat breakfast. That's something we just have to look at and see, how are you fueling yourself with nourishment.

The next one is rhythms around movement. You know, I grew up on Richard Simmons, Jane Fonda, even sliding into some of the hard cardio stuff. And rhythms around movement are not punishing cardio to burn calories. In midlife, we have to start thinking about movement that feels supportive, that manages stress, that strengthens our body in a way that fits the life you actually have. So where can you be consistent? In getting some walking in, getting some strength training in. Moving your body, swimming, biking, pickleball, whatever it may be. Just thinking about movement.

The next one is rhythms around rest. And when I talk about rest, I don't talk about sleep. Sleep is a part of rest, but it's certainly not the whole picture. Sleep matters enormously. But rest as a daily practice, putting small pauses through your day, and I'm not talking about something elaborate, I'm talking about moments of quiet. Just giving your nervous system a chance to come out of that constant activation.

And finally, rhythms around how you listen to yourself. Checking in, noticing what your body is asking for, instead of always overriding it. Starting to pay attention is a really good key around what your body is asking for.

A Client Story: The Breakfast Shift

[00:10:42] Shari Biery: I worked with a woman who came to me feeling completely off, but she had been trying everything. Eating cleaner, exercising harder, getting to bed earlier, and she was still exhausted, and foggy, and frustrated.

And when we slowed down and started looking at what was actually happening in her body and her days, we found that she was not eating consistent meals during her week. She was skipping breakfast, running on coffee, crashing in the afternoon, and then eating erratically at night. And her blood sugar was a rollercoaster.

So we did not have to add anything. We did not change her diet dramatically. We just started with one thing, eating a nourishing breakfast consistently every morning. And within two weeks, she told me on that coaching call that week, my afternoon crashes are gone. My mood feels steadier, and she was sleeping better.

So, you see, her body wasn't broken. It just needed a different rhythm.

How to Start Listening to Your Body

[00:11:56] Shari Biery: So, how do you start listening to your body? After years of overriding our bodies, this is probably one of the biggest gifts we can give to ourselves in midlife, starting to look at everything with curiosity instead of criticism.

Instead of asking what is wrong with me, you ask, what is my body trying to tell me right now? Just start noticing. Not fixing. Noticing. When do you feel energized? When do you feel drained? What time of day does your brain feel clearest? What happens to your mood when you skip a meal? How does your body feel after different kinds of movement? And what helps you sleep? And what disrupts it?

This is body literacy. It's learning to read your own signals. And it starts not with a big overhaul. But with just a simple pause. One quiet moment a day to check in and ask, what do I actually need right now? That question is so simple, but the practice of asking it changes everything.

A Question to Sit With

[00:13:20] Shari Biery: So, let me ask you, what is one signal your body's been sending you that you've been overriding or ignoring? Just take a look at that, and think about that. Don't try to fix it, don't try to solve it, just notice it. Notice it. And begin listening. And remember, listening is the beginning of coming back to yourself.

So, your body hasn't turned against you, it is just asking for something different. And when you stop fighting it and start listening to it, when you trade the rigid plan for a rhythm that fits the season you're actually in, something shifts. Energy returns, fog lifts, you start to feel more like yourself again. And that's what makes this work possible.

Closing

[00:14:17] Shari Biery: So if today's episode resonated, I have a couple of things for you. I have the Midlife Spark Type Quiz. And I also am over on Substack, sharing more and building a community. There are new episodes releasing weekly, so be sure to come over there if you can and check us out.

So, thanks for spending time with me today, and remember, if something really resonated for you today, maybe you had a conversation this week with a friend, and this came up, or you think about it here this week with someone, or talk about it. Share it with them. This is the kind of thing women need to hear right now, is more supportive things, and things where you don't have to feel alone anymore.

So, until next time, keep taking your turn.